6:56 a.m. - 2003-01-07
Give me my Coke or I'll pee in your vending hole!!!
I just got out of my English class; this is the first time I've had an English class since 2000...senior year of high school, for those who care. Well, 1999, really, being that it was first semester. I really hated that class. Actually, it was the teacher I disliked so much. Skari would take the word "hate" out of the world, if she could pick one word to remove. I feel so shallow for picking...uh...the last name of an Asian artist that also signifies male genitalia in comparison to the things my "family" picked. Family. Mine keeps changing, and you guys know how much I *love* change. I collect it in little tins in my drawers that used to have junk food in them. Ha, tarnished pennies in tins that used to hold chocolate-covered pretzels. How appropriate. It was WHITE chocolate at that. College makes me feel dumb. For that matter, life in general makes me feel pretty stupid. I used to be one of those kids that never had to study and made straight A's anyway (except in P.E...I never had a lesbian teacher), and then somewhere along the line, things started actually getting hard, and lo and behold...SaraNade didn't know how to study!! Big shock there. Now who's smart? Now that I'm in college...well...I study when I don't have much of a choice, like the night before a test. Ken said that his New Year resolution was "to take stuff more seriously", meaning school...which isn't a bad idea. But sometimes, it's really hard to care, you know? You do the same things over and over and wonder what the point of it all is, and then you get to thinking that maybe you're less of a person because you're not so great at writing essays anymore, or you can't sight read, and you don't know the difference between any musical genres, yet you want to be a chorus teacher. Only maybe you'll never make it. I guess most of you prolly don't have those exact thoughts, but maybe something like them...? And then there are the days when you just can't stand being around yourself; you get on your own nerves THAT much...do ya'll ever feel that way? Like, how does anyone put up with you when YOU don't ever want to be around you? And you look in the mirror and you KNOW that that's supposed to be you, but you aren't really sure it is, like maybe you think you really don't look that way. That's something I never can explain right, but I do it all the time. We talked a lot about waving in lunch today; it came up when I asked why it is that people'll like me and not actually tell me until a year, or two, or five, or whatever...there was going to be a long, unbearably dull rant about that, but you guys lucked out. So we talked about waving, and when it's the right time to wave, and what if the person you're waving at doesn't want to wave back? It was a pretty amusing dialogue; especially when poor Pop joined in...sucks that I'm so obvious, though. Last night, Skim and I were talking about Skalex, and she got all...well...the way she gets when she talks about him, and whoever reads this better remember what I'm about to say, 'cause I never will again..:-p Normally, I would refer to the behavior as "gay", but maybe I'm getting soft or something...so I was watching her get all giggly and cute (ewww....I can't believe I said that) and stuff, and I'm so glad that she...that ALL of you...have found someone that makes you act gay like that. Then I wondered if I would ever get that way about anyone...you know, without being afraid to show it. 'Cause it sort of sucks when everytime you like someone, it's more of a mourning time than a cause for celebration, you know? Yeah, so anyway. Today's lessons...Lesson number one. No matter HOW MUCH you love someone, you CAN'T want to kiss them ALL the time; it's just not practical. It's kinda like if you're someone that likes to go to the bathroom...sure, it feels nice when you're doing it, but there are certain times and places when you just have to hold it in. Lesson number two: If you leave Coke sitting out for about three weeks, it grows this unattractive green slime that kind of floats on the surface and leaves behind black spots that look suspiciously like ticks when you pour the stuff down the toilet. HOWEVER, I'll bet it STILL tastes better than Diet Coke. The End.

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