12:46 p.m. - 2013-06-28
Roller Coasters
Well, books, of course. I can't take the inadequacies of local management out on books...although it does seem as though I've gotten much more particular about what I read. Most things will hold my interest but fail to impress me as a whole. Examples: The Mortal Instrument series (skip it), the Twilight series (did I really need to say that out loud?), and, in my opinion, although I'm willing to compromise that it may just be me, the Song of Ice and Fire series.

Exception: The Hunger Games series. If you haven't read it, you need to. It is amazing.

There are days when I think I should try, one more "one more" time, with my mother's mother...I moved in with her briefly during our moment of reconciliation, and it was every bit as bad as I'd expected, complete with monthly evictions, of course. But...I thought we'd sort of come to an understanding, even after I did eventually move back out. Things seemed good...and then they weren't again. I could have tried harder...I just didn't. I was tired of the drama, and hurt that she'd resort to it again, after everything. Maybe I should have given her another chance, though...she's not exactly young, and nobody changes overnight.

As far as my mother goes, I feel like I'm just waiting for THE phone call, the one that will tell me he's finally killed her outright, or someone else has, or something. I realize this is morbid, but it seems like it's the only call I haven't gotten in regards to her. We've already covered the jail and hospital bases, as well as everything in between.

I will give my dad your message. I don't know that he'll understand...but I don't know that he won't. You know, if it weren't for you, I probably never would have met him...so thank you for that. Of course he isn't perfect, but it's good to know how the other side of my genetic pool was paved, even if it ultimately changed very little regarding the actual water.

Traction in life just seems to come more naturally for some people than others. It's sort of disheartening. This is why I think there's maybe a lot of merit in being a farmer back in the day rather than all this scrabbling to get ahead in a career nonsense that we've all resorted to now. Not that I can exactly see Becky as a farmer, but you get the idea. She, and you -- and many others -- have so much talent and spirit that seems to go to waste in this ridiculously modern world. All one can do is try.

I'm glad you didn't bail out. Maybe her pastor is on to something. Maybe she isn't ready...I obviously can only make so many assumptions based on photographs alone, but she looks young. She could just be scared...or she could be a lesbian (I kid, I kid!).

At the end of the day, though, what is it YOU want? Do you want to try again with her, or cut your losses and move on?

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